CAI Lab 11/20

Love Poem- Prose in Minor Key

I heard from a poet that I love, that writing a love poem is the kiss of death. She said, "I have heard some love poems that are so bad they make your ass hurt." I'll just be frank. Chances are this poem will suck a pucker face that lemons bring because I am going down that soiled and much often poorly trodden path of writing love poem.

I had lunch today with a woman I love, my mother. She said that love should be easier than what I've encountered. She said, about my situation, "Men are like buses. Just when you think you've missed one, another is pulling up." I'll just be frank. Chances are I wouldn't recognize the bus I should be on anyway, even if it had my name on it in hot pink.

I talked with a friend I love today, about love, and she thought my idea was totally wonky. She said, "If what you want is to not care, then he shouldn't be your boyfriend." I'll just be frank. Chances are she is right, he shouldn't be my boyfriend because I wouldn't even try to write a punch you in the neck lemon suck love poem about him.

I had a conversation with myself today, about love, and I learned the secret of life! I said to myself, "Well, what you need to learn is how not to care! Because if you don't give a rats ass about someone they can't hurt you." I'll just be frank. Chances are this is some of the best advice I've ever heard.

It then occurred to me: There is a pin needle like a puffer fish thin line between love and hate.

Erotic Poem- Lucky Girl

I wish I had the inspiration to write any number of
wonderful oo-y goo-y drippy sappy love sick things
about you, or your body, or your mind, or your heart.
You probably think you deserve them
and that I'd write a many splendor-ed piece
expounding on your glory and what a lucky girl I am.

I wish I could parody your arms to bulls horns
your chest to spaghetti and meat sauce
or your hands to circus performers and midgets.
You probably think I'd come up with something good
Full of delicious entdres and sensually alluring words
to glorify your name and to detail what a lucky girl I am.

I wish I could be tongue and cheek and
make some joke about lollipops and gum drops
and speak of how you taste like candy.
You probably think you do taste like a strawberry lollipop
That I would just want to lick you all day long
because you are just that glorious and what a lucky girl I am.

I wish I could find a way to explain to you
whisper in your pinprick ears that I understand
why your last girlfriend punched you in the face.
My words an angry badger trapped in my throat
just waiting to explode lime slug puss all over
because you really so very glorious and what a lucky girl I am.

I wish constantly you were someone else
and I wish you'd just go away
leave me alone
Your worth crumbs on the floor
I don't ever want your touch
I only want to be rid of you
And destroy the word together.